Z is for Zimmer Motor Vans

My dad had a van like this from when I was a baby up until about 1994.  It was blue, and I still wish we could see conversion vans like this on the road.  Newer models are much safer and easier to drive, but these vehicles were perfect for family trips. And our van was from Zimmer Motor Vans.  I don't know if that was just a dealership or a motor company, but there it was.

Y is for Young People

Here is a young person who looks even younger.  Many women say that is a good thing, but I see my five gray hairs and think they are beautiful.  I like being older.  I like being mature.

The only drawback to looking younger than 19 is that people still don't take you seriously as an adult.  You're still naive with stars in your eyes.  Now that I am 9 years older than that, I realize more that they're exactly right.  I have no clue what is going on or how to solve any problems I read about on facebook.  That does not mean I'll start watching the news.  My only news source is facebook and I need no other.

As I do get older, however, I think the main thing I'm torn in is political views.  I will never be a liberal, thank you very much.  I won't be libertarian because I'm against anarchy.  However, the last political thing I did I agreed more with the libertarians than the Republicans.  I know it's not because they were about my age.  That doesn't influence me.  I'll never support Ron Paul and will oppose their apathetic views on abortion.

But somehow, they grabbed me more than the side that I'm on.  Why?  Did I feel like the older people were not listening to them?  I think that might be it.  I certainly would love to find a middle way where there are more Patrick Henrys who go slightly too far in fighting for freedom versus the GOP who only do things based on America. 

Perhaps the GOP should do a better job of informing my generation about the policies and reasons behind their rules.  They should inform us of the lies perpetuated by the liberals but also explain why they should be on the Republican side, warts and all.  I'm definitely there for the one issue I vote on.  I would like to have more of both GOP and libertarian views so I can define my own political views based on the right decision and not just because my political party endorses it.

X is for Xt-likeness

I think this is another post inspired by Tim, but mostly it's just a post about how I realize more and more that a man and woman's marital relationship is a picture that God provided of what the Church's relationship will be with Christ.

I met Tim at a time when I was very confused about my life.  I was hurt over a friendship loss, lonely, and very depressed.  Then Tim came along and now I had a friend that gave me everything I sought in people before I met him.

The good thing is those previous friendships improved some.  It finally came to a point where I'm marrying Tim in three months and I seriously need to be faithful to him and no one else.  I can still talk to previous people that I loved, but my loyalty is with Tim who I expect to live with for the rest of my life after July 27.

It's that way with Christ.  He saved us when we hated him, worshiped other people and things, and even now we still want to keep in touch with our old idols.  But the thing is, he's our betrothed, and the previous loves don't matter anymore.  The Church needs to be faithful to Christ, the only one who can truly fulfill her.

I think I understand the Trinity slightly better since I've been in premarital counseling.  God is three people, but one God.  The Father, Son and Holy Spirit are one God, but they still have different roles, but those roles can overlap, too.  The Father thought of this whole planet and how to save it, the Son carried that plan out in a body and died for our sins, and the Spirit is God's real presence with me.

Unlike the Trinity, marriage is only two people.  One is a man and one is a woman, but we will still be one marriage.  The man is the spiritual head who provides for the family and leads it in the Lord.  The woman is the support who raises the kids and makes the man's leadership possible.  But as I see soon, I have a job and he is great with children.  Our roles are different but they overlap because we will be one flesh.

And as I slowly forsake all for Tim, there is one that I love more: Jesus.  And as he provided a friend that reminds me of him, and he is the only source of my life, I need to slowly abandon all competitors and be faithful to Christ and how he is truly described in the Bible.

It would be really silly if as I got closer to marrying Tim that all of a sudden, I would prefer to hang out with his mother.  She's a great woman and he looks a lot like her, but she's not the one I'm marrying.  I'm marrying Tim.  What if I decided I couldn't talk to Tim anymore and only sent him messages through his friends that I know through BCM?  Should I want to marry Tim if our relationship is so estranged that I have to talk to him through a third party?  How much more heinous is it when we feel so unworthy of Christ's love that we feel like we can only talk to him through a priest or try to spend more time with his mother.  They may be great people and good friends, but Christ is my betrothed, not them. 

Yes, I am unworthy of his love, but Christ pursued me and lifted me from my despair and meaninglessness.  He is the one I'll spend eternity with.  Not some special person in the Bible, not people who speak for him today, not even Tim.  He is the new Adam, and the Church is his bride, and we all carry him in us thanks to his generous gift of his Holy Spirit.  We all bear Christ, and he still dwells with us despite ourselves.  And I'm finally figuring that out because he sent me Tim makes me understand God so much better.

W is for Wedding Cake

I never thought that when I shopped for a wedding cake that I would need to know what flavor I wanted.  Or that it might need to match the colors in wedding.  I seriously thought about picking a blue cake, but my colors are green and yellow.

I now have to decide if I want to go with the cheaper cake or the thousand dollar cake.  I'd love the cheaper one but I would need to see customer reviews.  Anyway, now I need to decide on a flavor.

V is for Video Guy

I came home from two hours of studying at the Conyers Starbucks.  The thing I love about that particular franchise is the guy who sets up a desktop computer and does video imaging all day long.  He is an inspiration.  I feel inspired as I now work outside of an office and have more mobility.  I'm not confined to a desk for eight hours, and if I have to do things for friends and family, then I'm free.  I hope to even figure out how to freelance as a paralegal.

I do like having a part-time professional job without having to go to an office.  I still have to be disciplined.  I get up, shower, get dressed, eat breakfast, brew some Earl Gray hot.  I also take a break when my head is about to explode from reading case law.  I have yet to see how this situation goes as I get married and start a family.

U is for Utility

This is my thoughts on the article in this month's Tabletalk "When God Is Not Enough" by Scotty Smith.

"Israel's drift into idolatry didn't happen because the people became bored with the liturgy of their temple, enamored with the music of the worship bands in pagan temples, or impressed with the oratory of the new Canaanite prophet who had just moved into the neighborhood.  No one in Israel went looking for a new worship service, but for new gods to service them.  The center of worship shifted from God to themselves.  They began to worship worship more than they worshiped God -- that is, they relationship with God became utilitarian rather than doxological."

There really is only one religion in this world, and it is everything that is not Christianity as defined in the Bible.  And it is really empty.  It denies the possibility of God's judgment.  All people will graduate into a state of love.  Thing is, if we are all escaping judgment, then there is really no reason to care for the poor and the oppressed.  There is no reason to accept people who disagree with us.  Actually, this universalist mindset causes more judgment on people than if you'd agree that God will eternally punish the wicked some day and save his elect.  For the elect, he's already punished their wickedness on Jesus.  None of those people will end up in hell.

As for the utilitarian worship of God, we forget every single day that God did not create this world for us.  He created us for him - for his eternal glory and our eternal enjoyment of him.  Will God be the Lord of our lives even when it hurts or is he just going to be a magic charm to enhance our lives here?  Will we trust that the only way to salvation is through Jesus's name only - not Buddha, the Dalai Lama, Thor, Zeus, Oprah, myself, and dare I say a deceased saint and even Mary.  The latter two believed in Christ alone for their salvation and would be appalled that people put them on the same level as Jesus.  But it's not just those people.  Everybody has somebody or something that declares to God that Christ is not enough.  I get so impatient with waiting on God and decide that he needs help, and I end up betraying him and cheating myself of the only thing that is good.  I love my computer more than God.  I love my friends more than God, and I will follow them off a cliff.  I love my church so much that I will blindly follow it even when it flagrantly goes against the Bible.

This is the example of us thinking it unfair that God gave us only Jesus as our salvation and no 5-step process we can do ourselves that God can simply enhance.  We reject the freedom that comes from realizing that the world does not depend on us.  The things it offers only enslave us.  Jesus is the true freedom, and still the only way, truth, and life.  Nobody goes to the Father except through him.

T is for T-Rex

This is for the sweet guy I'm marrying 3 months from Saturday.