What do you do if a David and Bathsheba situation develops among the Christian music industry? Or in your church leadership? What do you do?
I don't know if this gnaws at me because I'm a newlywed and get dismayed every time I hear of another couple divorcing. But just the same, when you hear of a couple who had been married since forever and worked and toured together getting divorced because of an affair, what do you do?
I know personally, I still believe even the things I learned from that couple. Derek Webb and Sandra McCracken really got me to believe in Reformed theology in a way that made sense and did not hurt. Then, Derek left Caedmon's Call and grew more controversial. He opposed Bush (not as big a deal now as it was then) and he always seemed open to the gay community. It's like, he took his free grace and became an antinomian. He preached the total depravity of man so much that he decided to stop trying.
But still, is all lost? I don't think so. Years later when I saw her in concert I realized, I still love Amy Grant. Her music is still really good. Every once in a while I like Sandy Patti. And I look at my own life. I have sinned. How dare I cast the first stone?
But my soon-to-be brother-in-law, Stuart asked an interesting question. What do we do about church leadership that's been divorced? There are so many factors to take into it. All I know is that when the David and Bathsheba episode occurred, David spent some time in exile while his son tried to take his throne and kill him. He had to go through a season of rehab due to the consequences of his folly. He still got to be the wonderful king of Israel after God's own heart and share in Jesus's ancestry.
Do church leaders need to go through a time of counseling an rehab if an affair should occur or if a divorce happens? Maybe. What if the wife left him and it wasn't his fault? He may still need to take time to get his family and life in order before he's reinstated to full leadership again.
But one thing is for sure, never take your marriage for granted. Spend time with your husband every day and never go around saying, "this can never happen to me." The spirit is willing but the flesh is weak. You need to pray that God strengthens your marriage every day and also spend time each day loving your spouse. You need to be intentional and remember the vow you made. And always rely on God's grace. It's the only way two different people can live together in a marriage and for the marriage to last.