Friday, August 24, 2012


So the title to that is the lyrics from the song Blue.  I think Eve 6 sang it.  Really, those are the lyrics.  The whole chorus is "I'm blue" and then all those non-words.  But I'm feeling blue this week.  I'm gonna be open about it, but I came to the point where I just have to give up on someone for a while.

I'm actually too mature to stay in a three-year-old tantrum situation with someone who I thought was more mature.

Also, it's my parents' 30th anniversary.  It's a milestone and an anniversary, so I'm thinking of mom more this week.

I didn't get out of the house much this week.  and both last night and tonight, I've been so sad that people have noticed while I'm trying to be strong.

But I did trace my anxieties and obsessions to still mourning over mom.  That's actually normal, and I'll live with that the rest of my life.

And my penchant for arguing?  Turns out I ended up doing it so much this year that I decided to like it.  But it's never for no reason.  I really believe what I say, and I really believe it's important enough to risk friendship over.

This only makes me more hesitant to move on and just call people.  I have serious anxieties over calling people.

I'm so glad for church groups.  I feel as broken as some of the people that I minister to.

How am I going to find time to not be sitting before my computer all day in the next week?  Granted, that will be hard as I have two online classes.  And feel like working on them ahead of time.

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